I love April Fool's Day. One day a year, I can read the news and simply assume that if it's patently deranged, it's not for real.
"Anti-globalisation protesters at G20 summit"
How can anyone admit to being "anti-globalisation"? That's basically "pro-poverty". Oh wait, it's April Fool's - phew, for a moment I thought they might be serious.
"Miss Universe enjoys hospitality at Guantanamo Bay"
Oh, the irony. A, get this, Venezuelan beauty queen upholding "a longstanding relationship with the USO" by holidaying at the Caribbean's most notorious prison camp. How gullible do they think we are?
"Government steps in to limit power price rises"
In a world of global warming and frequent outages caused by transmission problems, how stupid do you have to be to encourage people to use more electricity? Because that's what the NZ government is doing. Thank goodness it's April Fool's.
"US Justice Dept moves to drop Ted Stevens's conviction"
So let's get this straight: the poster boy for Republican corruption was squeaky-clean all along? Good one. Can you just "toss out" a conviction?
Sadly, now it's 2 April, and I have to face the unpalatable fact that all of these stories were, apparently, true.
Addendum: Since posting this, the BBC has completely ripped off my idea. Thanks guys. Makes me feel like a real journalist again.